I Wanna Go Home

"I wanna go home."
"You are home," she said. :)

Home

Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm

May be surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky, I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
This was not your dream
But you always believed in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
In either Paris or Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel alone
And let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It'll all be all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home 

- Michael Buble, Home

Love,

Meet Waffles

I was definitely delusional when I wanted to get a beagle as a guard dog and a running companion.
The only reason an intruder would be injured or die under my beagle's watch, is that he/she would be licked to death.
HAHAHA.
And because beagles are hounds, they follow whatever scents their little noses pick up. So do you think my beagle would run next to me and stick to me like I'm her savior? Go figure.
So yes. The joke's on me. -__-"
And she's soooooooo stubborn. Ughhhhh. So, so stubborn.
Mom, if you think I am stubborn, I found my match. Hah!

But then again, that little thing taught me how to be patient, kind, forgiving, and forgetful. :P
I have to admit, sometimes I get so angry at her that I smack her really hard. For a short moment she would give me this face:

Then after 5 minutes, it's back to this:

If only humans can forgive and forget like a dog. The world would be a better place.

[Waffles at 8 weeks]

 [12 weeks]

 [15 weeks]

 [#twerkitlikeWaffles]

[I have a pet monster. Ughhhh.]

[Meet Waffles: Look at the "star" on her back. :) ] 

P/s: Please stop chewing everything within your reach. I can already imagine what's in your little stomach if I ever bring you for an X-ray.

Love,

Merdeka Cup 2015 (Floorball & Me, Part 2)

For every high, there is a low.
So. Just like how there are highlights in my floorball career, there are not so great times too. And I have to say, after 3 years of Merdeka Cup National Floorball Championship, this 4th year is probably the toughest, and most emotional one. :( *Coldplay singing in the background.. "Nobody said it was easy... Nobody said it would be so harddddddd...*

As some of you may know already, moving to Kota Kinabalu means having to play for Team Sabah.
Yes yes. I know you are gonna say: "You can still play for Penang what.."
True. I can.
But was it the right decision..? I'm not sure. And being unsure, I already knew the answer to the question.
Plus, I can't train with the Penang team. It's definitely not right for me to train with them once a month and crash their party during game day, and screw up their game play.
And if I play for team Penang, means I don't get to train during Sabah's state training, which also means:
NO TRAINING AT ALL.
EELEEN WILL SUCK.
AND WHAT'S THE POINT FOR TEAM PENANG TO HAVE SOMEONE WHO SUCKS.

So no matter how I try to deny, I knew what decision I have to make. Not because I want to. But because I know it's the right thing to do. Simple as that.
But then again... *AGAIN Coldplay singing in the background.. "Nobody said it was easy... Nobody said it would be so harddddddd...*

Playing against my own teammates was difficult. And they are not just teammates. They are people I have helped nurtured, who have grown under my care, whom I fought together and cried together for years. The amount of tears, sweat, bruises, pain. The wins and the losses.
And suddenly, I'm playing against them. And shooting against the one girl I hold closest at heart.... Nobody understands how that feels. But I'm glad Michaela and I talked about it beforehand. I sorta prepared myself for what's coming, but I didn't expect it to be so hard.

But as always, God is good. He is good. When there is brokenness, there is healing.
I broke down and cried after the game against Penang. But at the same time, I knew something in me changed. And I can say, my bond with babygirl and the girls has gotten stronger. At the same time, I've let go certain anger, doubt, jealousy and burden that I was carrying on my shoulder for 9 months.
And it was also clear, that playing for Sabah was the right thing to do.

To be able to lead the Sabah girls to their first ever win (against KL, 6-5), and to be the one to score the winning goal 1 minute 48 seconds before the final whistle, I knew God wasn't joking when He placed me here. And I was serious when I said it was Sabah ladies' first ever win. They have never won any games as a state team. When we went to Singapore for friendlies, it was 0-15, 2-8, 2-10, 3-12 etc. -.-"

[Sabah Ladies' first win against KL]

[The irony]

[That moment of loneliness when you don't feel like celebrating, and at the same time, the people who are supposed to understand were mad at you..]

But I know, that tribulation and difficult time produces perseverance, and perseverance develops strength of character, and character produces hope. :)
I will have faith. :)
And before I end, an eye candy for you people. My girl. HEHEHE. :3

[Pei Yi: Mick! Secretly pass the ball to me! Faster! Referee cannot see!]

HAHAHA.

Love,

Floorball & Me (Part 1)

2015 has been an interesting yet challenging year for me and my floorball career. One of the highlights is to have played in the multi-sports event 28th South East Asia Games.

Floorball made it's debut as a medal contending sports for the first time in the recent 28th SEA Games!! With Singapore being the host country. Abo then. *Smirks*
Back in 2013, Floorball was just a demonstration sports during the 27th SEA Games in Myanmar. And I can't be more thankful because I've been given the chance to be a part of the Malaysia Women's Floorball Team for both years. :)

 [Malaysia Women's Floorball Team Year 2015]

[Aainaa, Yen Yen, Dorcus, Nila, Eeleen & Michaela]

[Meet a good friend of ours - May! Always so supportive and helpful. :) ]

There were bitter sweet memories of course. Bitter because, despite being in 3rd place, the ladies team didn't get any medals. Sweet because we fought really hard together as a team. And my Babygirl was there with me, as my keeper. :) It was a humbling experience. I wasn't really sad that we didn't get into finals, because to be very frank, Thailand deserved it. :) No doubt it was hard for the Malaysian team to train together more often due to lack of funding and also geographical issues, but looking at how much effort and hardwork Thailand put in, they totally deserve to be in the finals.
And to see so many of my girls in the current Malaysia Women's Team, I am honestly very proud and happy. :) I just wish I could have done more for some of them whom I think, deserve to be in the team too. Perhaps someday, when I coach the Malaysia Women's Floorball Team. :p
Someday.

[So proud of this girl. :) Ling Ling & I]

 

 [My Chinese School Friend Shan Ling :P]

 

[The Malaysian Floorball Contingent]

Last but not least, thank you, Babygirl. :) For constantly supporting me and telling me that I can; for praying for me and also for shouting at me on court to run faster. HAHAHA. And I pray that you will have a bright future in floorball ahead of you. I may not always be there for you as a teammate (getting old, may retire soon), but know that I will always be your #1 fan. :) Loves.

Love,

Battles

"Everyone's fighting a battle of their own." I never understood what it meant. Until today.
I never really understood because some people seem to live a perfect life. All smiles. Perfect family. Perfect job. Always cheery. Always kind. Until I saw myself in the mirror recently.
Always smiling, always strong, always trying to keep everyone together...
When I am the one who is falling apart inside. Bit by bit.
Don't ask me why. Because I can't tell you why. And even I do, you wouldn't understand.

But like everyone else, I'm fighting my battle. And I'm still fighting. I'm not giving up.
There is not a place where His grace is not sufficient for me. And I hang on to that. :)

Love,

Big Girls Don't Cry

It's been so long I don't even know where to start. Lol.
I remember I started blogging back in 2009 when I was studying in KK, Sabah. On 22nd of March 2009, I wrote my first blog post. And here I am again, back in KK after 6 years.
It's crazy how life will never turn out to be how you planned it. No matter how detailed your planning is, life will always take you a different journey.

It may not be how I want it to be, but I know God knows best. And I just need to walk in faith. :) I miss home though. I miss my baby girl. I miss the girls whom I trained floorball with. I miss the smell of my mom's facial wash. And perhaps my brother's fart too. Heh. But I need to be strong now. I need to be a big girl. And big girls don't cry.

Love,