There are times when my brain tells me this, but my heart tells me something else.
Just like in the projection of movie films, where the sound does not correspond to the lip movements of an actor or to any other sound source on the screen.
That's how my mind and heart is sometimes. They just don't sync. Sigh.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Sunday, January 22, 2012
12 Easy Tips for A Blissful Relationship
By YourTango.com (with a little additional information here and there by me. Teehee.)
1. Mind your manners.
"Please", "Thank you", "Sorry", "Excuse me" are just as important when you're communicating with your partner.
These little words are often forgotten when we get too comfortable with each other. Remember, these can go a long way in helping your partner remember that you respect and love him or her and don't take them for granted.
Ps: Don't fart or burp in front of your partner and think that it's okay to do so. *Annoyed face*
2. Variety is the spice of life.
Many of us are habitual beings. Like for me, I eat the same food whenever I enter a particular restaurant. Someone once told me I was the most boring and predictable person she's ever met. HAHA!
So here's the problem, studies have shown that dullness can lead to dissatisfaction with a relationship. My advice? Try something new every once in a while. Try out a new restaurant. Visit a place you two won't usually go. Do something crazy that you two have never thought of attempting. Discoveries you make together will keep you feeling close.
3. The people that plays together, stays together.
Find a sport or hobby that the two of you enjoy (And NO, watching TV doesn't count. Dang.). Be it floorball, biking, rock climbing, running, doing puzzles... Find something you both enjoy doing together.
4. Fight right.
Make sure you fight over the right reasons. In order to have productive arguments, keep these rules in mind. Use the right words and say it appropriately. Don't say things out of anger. Don't call your spouse names. When things get really tough, take a break from the argument. Let the other person finish his/her sentences. Don't initiate a discussion when you're angry.
5. I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine.
Nobody likes demands. If you want your lover to do something and you're not sure he or she will be agreeable, the quickest way to avoid a confrontation is to sweeten the deal.
Compromise is the key word. For example,
"I'll massage you if you watch next Monday's football game with me."
I'm 98% sure she'll take the deal. ;)
6. Two heads are better than one.
When you're in a relationship, it means you've made a merger. Not only in terms of joined assets but also inheriting his or her problems. Rather than looking at his problems as merely his own, tackle them together. For example, if he's gaining weight, rather than pushing him to diet on his own, enroll in an exercise program together.
7. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.
I personally think that couples shouldn't spend 247 together. Even when you're married. (Unless you happen to be working in the same company and in the same department laa...) This is important so that at the end of the day when you finally spend some quality time together, you get to discuss about each others' day.
Maintain your own friendships and occasionally have a night out without your significant other is important too. Doing things without your partner not only makes you miss him or her, it also keeps you sane. And, in case the relationship doesn't work out, you'll still have your friends.
8. Sound it out.
In other words: Communicate! Talking out the tough subjects such as money, religion, fidelity, raising kids-will not be the most fun you've had, but it will be valuable. Many relationships fail because couples don't communicate. Keeping feelings, thoughts and anger to yourself will be like keeping a bag of potato and carrying it around with you. Sooner or later, the potatoes are gonna rot, and it's gonna smell. And there's no way you can make a nice potato salad with rotten potatoes ain't it?
9. Laughter is the best medicine.
Learn to laugh at yourself and at silly mistakes. If he throws his red shirt into the washing machine and stained your RM300 white Polo-T during washing, laughing it off is, in the long run, better than getting angry. It's just a RM300 white Polo-T, not the end of the world. Plus, WHY DO YOU NEED TO BUY A RM300 WHITE POLO-T IN THE FIRST PLACE?!? Too much money to spend isit?!? Pfffffft.
10. Keep your eyes on the prize.
Yes, he forgot your co-worker's name for the tenth time, but it probably doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. If you keep your perspective fixed on the goal: To be in a happy, functioning partnership, then you're less likely to get tangled up in every minor annoyance.
11. Quitters never win.
Find a ritual and keep it alive, no matter what. Whether it's always kissing each other good night, holding hands when you're out, renewing wedding vows every year, sleeping in as late as you want once a month or committing to having salad for dinner once a week, pick something that makes you both feel good and stick to it, even when you're tempted to skip.
12. When the tough gets going, the tough get going...to therapy.
Studies show that couples who seek counseling during rocky periods are more successful in resolving their issues than those who don't. Whether its from a religious figure, counselor or mental health professional, getting an expert to help sort out strife is as wise as forgoing self-installation and hiring a plumber to put in a new sink.
5. I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine.
Nobody likes demands. If you want your lover to do something and you're not sure he or she will be agreeable, the quickest way to avoid a confrontation is to sweeten the deal.
Compromise is the key word. For example,
"I'll massage you if you watch next Monday's football game with me."
I'm 98% sure she'll take the deal. ;)
6. Two heads are better than one.
When you're in a relationship, it means you've made a merger. Not only in terms of joined assets but also inheriting his or her problems. Rather than looking at his problems as merely his own, tackle them together. For example, if he's gaining weight, rather than pushing him to diet on his own, enroll in an exercise program together.
7. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.
I personally think that couples shouldn't spend 247 together. Even when you're married. (Unless you happen to be working in the same company and in the same department laa...) This is important so that at the end of the day when you finally spend some quality time together, you get to discuss about each others' day.
Maintain your own friendships and occasionally have a night out without your significant other is important too. Doing things without your partner not only makes you miss him or her, it also keeps you sane. And, in case the relationship doesn't work out, you'll still have your friends.
8. Sound it out.
In other words: Communicate! Talking out the tough subjects such as money, religion, fidelity, raising kids-will not be the most fun you've had, but it will be valuable. Many relationships fail because couples don't communicate. Keeping feelings, thoughts and anger to yourself will be like keeping a bag of potato and carrying it around with you. Sooner or later, the potatoes are gonna rot, and it's gonna smell. And there's no way you can make a nice potato salad with rotten potatoes ain't it?
9. Laughter is the best medicine.
Learn to laugh at yourself and at silly mistakes. If he throws his red shirt into the washing machine and stained your RM300 white Polo-T during washing, laughing it off is, in the long run, better than getting angry. It's just a RM300 white Polo-T, not the end of the world. Plus, WHY DO YOU NEED TO BUY A RM300 WHITE POLO-T IN THE FIRST PLACE?!? Too much money to spend isit?!? Pfffffft.
10. Keep your eyes on the prize.
Yes, he forgot your co-worker's name for the tenth time, but it probably doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. If you keep your perspective fixed on the goal: To be in a happy, functioning partnership, then you're less likely to get tangled up in every minor annoyance.
11. Quitters never win.
Find a ritual and keep it alive, no matter what. Whether it's always kissing each other good night, holding hands when you're out, renewing wedding vows every year, sleeping in as late as you want once a month or committing to having salad for dinner once a week, pick something that makes you both feel good and stick to it, even when you're tempted to skip.
12. When the tough gets going, the tough get going...to therapy.
Studies show that couples who seek counseling during rocky periods are more successful in resolving their issues than those who don't. Whether its from a religious figure, counselor or mental health professional, getting an expert to help sort out strife is as wise as forgoing self-installation and hiring a plumber to put in a new sink.
Monday, January 16, 2012
OCD
Sounds like CoD? Call of Duty?
Hahahaha. Talk about CoD, my first time playing CoD was with Captain Awesome when we were still friends. And that bum bum sabotage me by stabbing me from behind while I was hiding and avoiding from being shot. Dang. Hmmmp!! .____.
Okay okay. Back to our topic - OCD.
OCD is short for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.
It is an anxiety disorder in which people have unwanted and repeated thoughts, feelings, ideas, sensations (obsessions), or behaviors that make them feel driven to do something (compulsions).
Like a needle getting stuck on an old record, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) causes the brain to get stuck on a particular thought or urge. For example, you may check the stove twenty times to make sure it’s really turned off, wash your hands until they’re scrubbed raw, or drive around for hours to make sure that the bump you heard while driving wasn’t a person you ran over.
Like a needle getting stuck on an old record, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) causes the brain to get stuck on a particular thought or urge. For example, you may check the stove twenty times to make sure it’s really turned off, wash your hands until they’re scrubbed raw, or drive around for hours to make sure that the bump you heard while driving wasn’t a person you ran over.
Sounds scary? Do I look scary to you? :(
Don't worry, I don't have repeated thoughts, ideas or feelings of killing somebody. LOL.
My problem is this: Being overly tidy. :) Have you seen people who wash their hands for 5 minutes at the sink and won't leave the bathroom though they're already really clean? They too suffer from OCD.
It was really, really hard for me.
I had to make sure that things were in order before I leave the room.
I had to make sure that the carpet is in line with the floor tiles.
I had to put my books at a "correct" angle.
My clothes are folded into the same size and has to be precisely stacked on top of one another.
I go to supermarkets and arrange their cans and bottles at a certain same angle for them.
The list goes on and on. And the worst part is, I don't do this once a day. I check each of them REPEATEDLY. I could spend 20 minutes keeping a book, making sure it's precisely angled to the corner. Sigh.
It got to a point that it really interfered with my daily life. I couldn't go out of the house without making sure that the carpets were flat on the ground. And even when I was out, I'd be anxiously thinking if my books were orderly arranged or my mom would pull one of my clothes out from my closet and "ruin" the whole arrangement.
I knew something was very wrong with me. And I knew I couldn't possible go on like this. I couldn't tell others about my problem because I felt like I was some sort of freak. I was shy and scared. So I prayed. I prayed because I don't know what else to do. I don't know how to help myself anymore.
And so God sent me away from home. Far away from my own comfort zone. And that's when things started to change. :)
I met my roommate, Jennifer in University, who always messes things up. A.L.W.A.Y.S.
I clean up, she messes up. I clean up again, she messes up again. All my proper arrangements, orderly stacked clothes, all the cleaning just seem to go to waste with her around. And it got to a point where I got so frustrated and I just stop cleaning and arranging things so meticulously. And that was when I realize, that my life didn't actually fall apart just because I don't put my clothes according to size or color. And in fact I feel more relieved when I actually let certain things be the way it is.
Not everything needs to be in perfect order, right? :)
Did I go for psychotherapy? No I didn't. Did I take medications? No I did not.
I placed my faith and trust in God. Have you heard of a statement that goes like this: "God will not help you if you don't help yourself." That's sooooo NOT true. I couldn't help myself.
Which is why I let God do His work in me. I guess I'm a living testimony now. :)
I'm still a tidy person. Ask Jennifer. Or Captain Awesome. Or my brother. Or my parents. LOL. :) I love cleaning up. But instead of it controlling me, I'm controlling it. I no longer get anxious or worried when I don't fold my clothes accordingly, though I still take longer than normal people to fold clothes laaa. Hehe. But I'm better now. I'm no longer ashamed to admit that I have OCD, because I've conquered it. :)
If anyone of you out there is suffering from the same problem, leave me a comment. If you're shy, comment as anonymous. We all need someone to talk to, eventually. :)
Don't worry, I don't have repeated thoughts, ideas or feelings of killing somebody. LOL.
My problem is this: Being overly tidy. :) Have you seen people who wash their hands for 5 minutes at the sink and won't leave the bathroom though they're already really clean? They too suffer from OCD.
It was really, really hard for me.
I had to make sure that things were in order before I leave the room.
I had to make sure that the carpet is in line with the floor tiles.
I had to put my books at a "correct" angle.
My clothes are folded into the same size and has to be precisely stacked on top of one another.
I go to supermarkets and arrange their cans and bottles at a certain same angle for them.
The list goes on and on. And the worst part is, I don't do this once a day. I check each of them REPEATEDLY. I could spend 20 minutes keeping a book, making sure it's precisely angled to the corner. Sigh.
It got to a point that it really interfered with my daily life. I couldn't go out of the house without making sure that the carpets were flat on the ground. And even when I was out, I'd be anxiously thinking if my books were orderly arranged or my mom would pull one of my clothes out from my closet and "ruin" the whole arrangement.
I knew something was very wrong with me. And I knew I couldn't possible go on like this. I couldn't tell others about my problem because I felt like I was some sort of freak. I was shy and scared. So I prayed. I prayed because I don't know what else to do. I don't know how to help myself anymore.
And so God sent me away from home. Far away from my own comfort zone. And that's when things started to change. :)
I met my roommate, Jennifer in University, who always messes things up. A.L.W.A.Y.S.
I clean up, she messes up. I clean up again, she messes up again. All my proper arrangements, orderly stacked clothes, all the cleaning just seem to go to waste with her around. And it got to a point where I got so frustrated and I just stop cleaning and arranging things so meticulously. And that was when I realize, that my life didn't actually fall apart just because I don't put my clothes according to size or color. And in fact I feel more relieved when I actually let certain things be the way it is.
Not everything needs to be in perfect order, right? :)
Did I go for psychotherapy? No I didn't. Did I take medications? No I did not.
I placed my faith and trust in God. Have you heard of a statement that goes like this: "God will not help you if you don't help yourself." That's sooooo NOT true. I couldn't help myself.
Which is why I let God do His work in me. I guess I'm a living testimony now. :)
I'm still a tidy person. Ask Jennifer. Or Captain Awesome. Or my brother. Or my parents. LOL. :) I love cleaning up. But instead of it controlling me, I'm controlling it. I no longer get anxious or worried when I don't fold my clothes accordingly, though I still take longer than normal people to fold clothes laaa. Hehe. But I'm better now. I'm no longer ashamed to admit that I have OCD, because I've conquered it. :)
If anyone of you out there is suffering from the same problem, leave me a comment. If you're shy, comment as anonymous. We all need someone to talk to, eventually. :)
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Stay Alive Lil' Tony
If you've read the news, you peeps would know about the pygmy killer whale which was stranded in shallow waters at the Kota Kinabalu Tanjung Aru beach few days ago.
You didn't read the news did you?? ><"
LOL.
But anywayyyyyy, they needed volunteers to help keep the pygmy killer whale stay afloat at deeper waters. So you know la...Captain Awesome's gotta do what Captain Awesome's gotta do... He volunteered. :)
Here's a picture of him and THE DORSAL FIN of the pygmy killer whale. HAHAHA.
What did you expect?? Picture of the whole whale kah?? LOL.
Photo courtesy of Ronn Zsea
Sadly, Captain Awesome spoiled his iPhone 4 while helping out. :( And then followed by a series of unfortunate events. (Let’s not talk about it here) :( Wish there's something I could do for him to make him feel better.
But til then, stay alive and keep surviving Lil' Tony!! Don't put Captain Awesome's sacrifice to waste. :)
Thursday, January 12, 2012
A Gentle Reminder
I'm reminded once again, that there is no retirement in doing God's work.
Only to be released to do something even greater for God. :)
Life is like a tour. And Jesus as our tour guide. The bible? Itinerary and rule book. :)
Which is why, if you follow the tour guide, you'll never get lost!
And a tour is supposed to be awesome!! :)
Yes. There are times when detour happens.
There are times when the weather is bad and you don't get to see what you want to see.
But Jesus never leaves us in the rain or snow; the same way a tour guide will never leave you in the freezing weather.
So let's not go astray. Let's not get distracted by other things along the way.
Let's focus on the destination written in the itinerary.
And we will reach our destination, we will find our purpose in this life. :)
Philippians 3:14 "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
What Is That??
It's SOOOOOOO cute!!! Oh my gosh!!!
Photo courtesy of BBC News
LOL. Anyway..... This is a long-eared Jerboa. :) A.k.a. Mickey Mouse of the Desert.
It's a nocturnal mammal which jumps around like a kangaroo. It has a pair of super size ears and a pretty long tail for a small animal its size. :)
One word: CUTE.
Sadly, I'll never be able to have this as a pet because it's been classified as an endangered species in the IUCN (International Union for Conservation of Nature) Red List. :(
Dear Long eared-Jerboa, make sure you cute little things give birth to lots of babies and don't go extinct okay? You're too cute to be extinct. :]
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