Monday, February 13, 2012

I wish you the best, Eeleen

I've been very confused lately. My head's been in such a mess.
It feels exactly like the time when I just finish high school and had no idea what I wanna do. But it's worse this time 'cause I'm no longer 17. Sigh.
I feel so trapped. Trapped in a circle. So afraid to take the first step out of it. Not knowing which way to move forward. So I keep going round and round. Round and round. And I'm starting to get tired going in circles.

I wanna step out of this. I need to. I know I was built and made for greatness. I know I was born to do something extraordinary. I just couldn't see it yet, with all this mess in my head.
But I know, from deep within me, I know I was meant for something bigger than this. 
Lord, help me find my way there. Please. Open my eyes to see. You said You wouldn't bring me to place where your grace isn't sufficient for me. And your grace is what I need now. 

Someone wrote me this:
"I know you're 25, and when you're at that age you feel compelled to be someone everyone expects you to be and you have to do things which are 'right'. And I don't want to say anything because it's not my place to be giving a 25 year old advice about what she should do with her life. I understand that it's difficult, what more for you, the one who's stuck in this situation. But whatever your decisions may be, I hope that one day you'll be able to experience all the happiness you truly deserve in this world. I wish you the best, Eeleen."

It made me teared. To know that someone understands what I'm going through. :') 
Gotta step out of this circle. Gotta follow my dreams. They know the way.

7 comments:

Adrian Tan CS said...

Hang in there cousin! its a bad/harsh time for me as well, but im sure we'll make it through the rain... we're born for the blue skies and the sunrises!

ky said...

How I wish someone would have said that to me back then? =(

You will be fine. Just never stop trying and someday, you will experience the happiness you truly deserve. Saying it for myself as well. =)

Eeleen said...

Thanks guys. :) Appreciate it. I know this is just a phase.
I know that the sun will come out after this storm. It's a time of molding and shaping that God allows to happen to me.
I know I'll make it through. Til then, we should all hang on to our boats and have faith. :)

Eeleen said...

It's not easy. But we'll make it through. :)

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Adrian Tan CS said...

glad u deleted that most recent post... kinda creepy after reading it

Eeleen said...

Ahhh?? You read?? I didn't even bother reading!! I think it's a spam. :( Sigh. So I terus delete!