Clenched Teeth, Clenched fists

I wished I could say that my new year started off with a bang. But sadly, it has been a bumpy ride ever since the first day of 2013. I really wanted to tell you my story, but after thinking through twice, I don't think it's too appropriate to write out my situation here, as I don't want my readers to be judging the people around me. Or misunderstand my situation. And most importantly, I don't want to say things that I can't take back, or hurt people with my words.

Sometimes I really wonder if God truly understands. 'Cause if He does, why does He allow anyone, allow me to go through this storm and feel so helpless, discouraged, and lonely..? Sigh. 

But of course He does. I'm sure Jesus felt the same the night before He was crucified. Helpless and lonely. Of course He does understand. 

Watched 7 pounds just now in the evening, and gave myself a reason to cry. Guess all I needed was someone to talk to; someone who understands. Someone who'd just come over and give me a hug, and say: "This is just temporary. It'll all be okay." But tonight, even those whom I thought cared about me most, are just too busy for me.

I will be okay. There are others in way more difficult situations than I am. I shouldn't be complaining here. So yes. I am gonna stop feeling sorry for myself and pick up my baton and continue running.

Come what may, I'm just gonna clenched my teeth and fists, and go against this storm.
Because I know, every storm runs out of rain.